Background first.
I once sort of dated a guy who only dated red heads and strawberry blondes. I qualified for his specific hair criteria and we started sort of seeing each other.
One night, we both were out at a party with my roommates and our mutual friends. (I don't know how it happened but my group of girlfriends were all "dating" a group of guy friends. It made date night easy.) Anyways, we are at this party...
Everybody is playing corn hole and somebody made bbq (this is the south!) and there was music and dancing and lots of fun to be had. My man friend drank a little bit too much. He had a pretty small frame and couldn't really drink a lot. I didn't drink anything that night because 1. I was under 21 and didn't really drink much at this time (if you were one of my roommates shut up... I know there was that oooone time you forced shots down my throat and then sent me to bed almost immediately after. jerks. love you, though :) )and 2. I knew someone was going to need a DD that night... just had a feeling.
At this point in our "fake dating relationship" I wasn't really feeling it anymore. I had started to move on to another guy. I have been told I am awful at dating. This is true. I think I'm great at relationships, but actually getting there is a serious struggle for me.
So my fake boyfriend needed a ride... And who does everybody point to? Me. Duh. Of course. Does my fake boyfriend want to go? Not really. He is making a bit of a fool out of himself and I couldn't let him do that. I knew how to get him home, but I didn't want to do it, yet knew I had to. I used my female sneakiness.
"If I drive you home, there is a 50% chance I'll let you kiss me"
He took the bait. Jumped in the car and made me book it to his place.
I never got out of the car, never kissed him. I am an awful fake girlfriend.
Interestingly enough, I have used that line again and it always works. Drunk guys are not always the smartest...
Anyways, we are in the car and before he leaves he says...
"I'll never get tired of counting the freckles on your face."
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